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2021-2022 Regular Season: Dallas Defeathers Philly
To Go 6-0 Against The NFC East And Hosts San Francisco As Part Of A
Wild Card Weekend Feast
January 14,
2022 At 11:09 PM CST
By Eric M. Scharf-
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As has been the case for so many years, the final week of the Dallas
Cowboys’ regular season was scheduled to (ideally) involve a
desperate battle over a last-remaining playoff berth or the NFC East
division crown. While the NFL loves, Loves, LOVES the
(practically-guaranteed) national television ratings bonanza that
comes with ANY game involving “America’s Team,” the imagined battle
to the (sudden) death between the hosting Philadelphia Eagles and
the visiting Cowboys was not how it would go down.
Though the opportunity to build more or any MOMENTUM was still at
hand, a seemingly less-competitive evening had been planned. The
Cowboys had already locked up the division, and both teams were
preparing for playoff inclusion. Numerous key players on both teams
were sidelined with the pre-tournament combination of preservation
against injury devastation and COVID-19 protocol staycation (where
everyone – from the still-unvacc’d to the momentarily-unmasked –
would sit in quarantine comedically pondering the source of so much
“You’re hurting the TEAM!” fan indignation and well-earned
discrimination).
Anyway, once the game got underway, it was clear that elements of
the Cowboys’ 41-21 victory over Philadelphia in week two would
continue to hold sway. Dallas’ 51-26 victory over the Eagles in week
18 even had a 1987 strike season vibe to it, one might say. Oh,
sure, the game was unnecessarily-close through the second quarter
with the contest tied at 17, but then the Cowboys came clean. Once
Eagles’ backup quarterback Gardner “Jock Strap King” Minshew
(filling in for a comfortably resting Jalen Hurts) ran out of his
always-admirable moxie, Philly had little else but
third-and-fourth-string epoxy.
The Dallas Cowboys (and their fans) had loads of fun in the “City of
Brotherly Love.” The 2021-2022 regular season was done, and it was
time for both teams to prepare (however realistically and
unrealistically, respectively) for another postseason opportunity to
go deeply beyond towards hoisting another Lombardi above.
Short Shots And Hot Spots
Cowboys star quarterback Dak Prescott threw for 295 yards and five,
FIVE touchdowns on just 21-27 while sustaining but one sack and ZERO
turnovers of any kind.
YES, Yes, yes, Dak achieved those highly-efficient stats largely
against many an Eagles scrub, “but, But, BUT a dub is a dub,” and pay the
quality of competition no mind.
Cowboys star running back Ezekiel Elliott gained 87 yards on 18
carries to barely cross 1,000 yards (the annual NFL standard which -
due to a 17th and eventually an 18th regular season game - may
become a bygone canard). Considering how often Zeke had to sacrifice
touches in exchange for a critical blocking assignment on his
still-balky, brace-supported knee, fans (some but not all) were
happy to shout "He reached 1K alignment! Yippee!"
YES, Yes, yes, had his backup Tony Pollard not been given the night
off (to further-nurse and better-ensure his still-present plantar
fascia injury would not prevent his pending playoff performance from
going aloft), Zeke might not have even played, and his incoming,
sub-1,000-yard statistic would have stayed.
Former Super-Bowl-winning Eagle and current third-string backup
running back Corey Clement chipped in 58 more yards of his own on
just seven carries for an 8.3-yard average. Fourth-string running
back Ito Smith – with but ONE touch – added his own four-yard
touchdown to all that scoring and such. Even undrafted rookie,
fourth-string reserve running back, and HBO "Hard Knocks" star
JaQuan "Showtime" Hardy had his "Anything You Can Do I Can Do
Better" moment to shine (in coming online to deliver 26 yards on
three carries plus a scintillating touchdown run on the Cowboys'
final offensive series).
YES, Yes, yes, the Cowboys’ running backs collected 171 yards of
ground game grind largely against many an Eagles scrub, “but, But,
BUT a dub is a dub,” and pay the quality of competition no mind (especially with a
Cowboys offensive line that – absent left tackle Tyron Smith – had
been in a potential bind).
Cowboys wideout Cedrick Wilson (often but not always chasing many a
fourth or even fifth-string scrap once starters Amari Cooper, CeeDee
Lamb, and Michael Gallup are ready for an in-series nap) hauled in
119 yards and two touchdowns on an efficient five of six catches.
Wilson (twice now in the injured-reserve-absence of Michael Gallup),
along with Cooper, Lamb, (two touchdowns from) tight end Dalton
Schultz, and (one score from) running back Corey Clement brought
more than a competitive dollop.
YES, Yes, yes, the Cowboys’ midair men would aerially amass 295
yards largely against many an Eagles scrub, “but, But, BUT a dub is
a dub,” and
pay the quality of competition no mind (with chunk plays of 37, 31,
and 31 over which Eagles defenders were surely resigned).
YES, Yes, yes, the Cowboys' running backs and receivers collected
chunk plays of 38, 37, 31, 26, and 22, “but, But, BUT,” slow your
roll, because they were all generated against the undermanned “you
know who.”
While "The Mighty Quinns" were surely enjoying seeing the offense do
their early-and-often part, the Dallas defenders also did their fair
share (minus cornerback Trevon Diggs and linebacker Micah Parsons
among others) to keep the entire team's performance looking smart
(and like one that holistically smothers).
Defensive tackle Neville Gallimore, as well as defensive ends
DeMarcus "Tank" Lawrence and Tarell Basham collected four
tackles-for-loss. Lawrence, defensive end Dorance Armstrong, and
defensive tackle Trysten Hill collected three sacks in the absence
of a certain rookie (quarterback-chasing) boss. Even linebacker
Leighton Vander Esch experienced
a 2018 flashback, producing a
timely interception (for just the third time in his career) from the
Philly's faulty offensive attack.
Less Small ‘N Cozy, More BIG Trophy
Dak Prescott had such a pleasantly-productive day that he was named
“NFC Offensive Player of the Week” for the third time this season
(and for practically having his way against a decimated defense that
held no sway). Week 18 was the first game of Prescott’s career where
he connected on five touchdown throws “and, And, AND” – with 37
total – eclipsed the single-season record of “That Announcer Guy.”
“Sometimes, that is just how it goes,” Tony Romo may have been heard
to yodel.
The weekly and monthly accolades (which multiple Cowboys – from
Micah Parsons to Trevon Diggs – have been picking up in spades) are
“WONDERFUL” but ultimately forgettable in the face of the ONE true
end-goal. Chest-thumping, myopic fans are known to love them, but
the PLAYERS need only focus on the trophy from which all those
fleeting paperweight awards historically stem.
YES, Yes, yes, the players, coaches, and even some team executives –
depending upon many a contract incentive – can financially benefit
from those individual, unit, and team-wide performances so
inventive.
One need only glance at the following list to get the CHANGE YOUR
PRIORITIES gist.
2018 – Divisional Round – LOST vs Los Angeles Rams 30-22
2018 – Wild Card Round – WON vs Seattle Seahawks 24-22
2016 – Divisional Round – LOST vs Green Bay Packers 34-31
2014 – Divisional Round – LOST vs Green Bay Packers 26-21
2014 – Wild Card Round – WON vs Detroit Lions 24-20
2009 – Divisional Round – LOST vs Minnesota Vikings 34-3
2009 – Wild Card Round – WON vs Philadelphia Eagles 34-14
2007 – Wild Card Round – LOST vs New York Giants 21-17
2006 – Wild Card Round – LOST vs Seattle Seahawks 21-20
2003 – Wild Card Round – LOST vs Carolina Panthers 29-10
1999 – Wild Card Round – LOST vs Minnesota Vikings 27-10
1998 – Wild Card Round – LOST vs Arizona Cardinals 20-7
1996 – Divisional Round – LOST vs Carolina Panthers 26-17
1996 – Wild Card Round – WON vs Minnesota Vikings 40-15
“The Tortured Cowboys Fan” – unlike so many Dallas Cowboys
supporters – would squeal with delight if Cowboys players would
routinely, MATURELY state: “Those LITTLE awards so cozy are
‘alright’ but DO NOTHING towards helping me and my teammates FINALLY
get closer to that BIG trophy and finishing our return-to-the-Super
Bowl fight!”
NO, No, no, Dak Prescott neither asked for the award nor paraded
himself around as if he was out of his gourd. “But, BUT,” The
Tortured Cowboys Fan is not wrong about players, coaches, heck, the
entire organization needing to refocus and perform in terms they can
mentally afford.
Good Quote Or Bad Bloat?
“Oh, unquestionably. There’s no in between. You really go into it
with the expectation of being in the playoff. The league is designed
to be 50-50. And, so, it is important that everything is setup to be
50-50, it’s that competitive and that fair the way it comes down,
the way you can get players, talent acquisition. The point is to get
here you need to have distinguished yourself, and once you get here,
all bets are off. A lot of that has got to do with AVAILABILITY of
your players at that time. We’re in good shape. We’re in real good
shape RIGHT NOW. We should be excited and be planning on it. You
don’t have but one winner here, and that’s the Super Bowl winner.” –
GM Jerry during “the Shan and RJ Show” on 105.3FM “The Fan” on how
he defines success in the playoffs (looking his mortality in the
face more than ever before and knowing that anything short of a
championship with THIS season’s team would be the most
personally-devastating of performance payoffs).
“Absolutely it does, and we’re well aware and should be aware.
That’s part of running the show. It really does, but Zuerlein really
brings a lot to the table. His leg strength, his touchbacks, his
ability to be a threat at length and distance. All of that is there.
He has had an exceptionally tough year for him and extra points, but
he’s a sound kicker, an experienced kicker, and our guys are all
sensitive about how to approach the game.” – GM Jerry during “the
Shan and RJ Show” on 105.3FM “The Fan” on if Greg Zuerlein’s
frequent kicking struggles have forced the Cowboys to modify their
approach (and seemingly
reversing his previous
week’s belief that Zuerlein was far from beyond reproach).
“I’m from Harrisburg where THE BULLIES get bullied. There’s a bully
in every gym. At one point, it’s going to take SOMEBODY to stand up
and fight. I AIN’T EVER back down from a challenge.” – Cowboys
linebacker and rookie sensation Micah Parsons (explaining how – when
it comes to the 49ers’ well-documented physicality and toughness –
he will be quick to say “Take a seat, son!”).
"I believe Dak is going to OWN THE MOMENT. He's going to SHOW Y'ALL
what he REALLY is about and going to TAKE [THESE] PLAYOFFS BY
STORM." – Cowboys defensive end DeMarcus “Tank” Lawrence on his
expectations for Dallas’ star quarterback (expressing confidence
that – in THIS moment of moments – Dak Prescott is going to be on a
relentless attack).
"It’s kind of unimaginable, honestly. I can't really believe it." –
Cowboys second-year wide receiver with his perspective on a first
taste of the postseason (and hopefully being set straight by the
team’s veteran leadership that neither CeeDee nor anyone else can
allow THIS gig to become too mentally big).
"Let's say the roles were reversed and [the COWBOYS] were at the six
seed, and we were at the three seed. Who's the last team you wanna'
play at the six seed? You DON'T wanna' play the Cowboys. They're
talented in every single position on their entire team. Like you can
list literal stars at each position group. So, it's gonna' be a
battle. It's gonna' be THE BIGGEST ONE of the year, obviously, which
that's what the playoffs are. And it's gonna' be two dogs JUST GOING
AT IT. And I think it's gonna' be a FOUR-QUARTER football game –
back and forth – and we're gonna' have to play our best game if we
want a chance to win." – 49ers linebacker Fred Warner during an
interview with Rich Eisen (providing a dose of humility or safe
neutrality (in the face of so many confident claims by 49ers fans,
prognosticators, and even teammates alike that – against San
Francisco – the Cowboys will be unable to drive a competitive
spike).
Play Keep Away With Greater Pay?
The New York Giants fired their head coach Joe Judge and “lost”
their GM Dave Gettleman to retirement.
The Minnesota Vikings fired their head coach Mike Zimmer and GM Rick
Spielman.
The Miami Dolphins fired their head coach Brian Flores.
The Denver Broncos fired their head coach Vic Fangio.
The Chicago Bears fired their head coach Matt Nagy and GM Ryan Pace.
The Jacksonville Jaguars fired their head coach Urban Meyer.
While fans understandably dread the fact that defensive coordinator
Dan Quinn continues to be a or THE hot candidate for one or more of
those head coaching thrones, the imminent, long overdue departure of
Will McClay (for a MUCH bigger but not necessarily better role)
could have caused even more groans.
“Could have? COULD HAVE? The person without whom the Cowboys – on
draft weekend AND in free agency – would have been unable to nav
with any level of urgency?!” you exclaim (trying to imagine WHO ELSE
the Cowboys could possible partner so nicely with GM Jerry and son
Stephen to continue drafting so well while discouraging the pouring
of good money over bad onto the occasional free agency fire).
“You mean former [Arena Football League] player turned AFL coach
turned Dallas Cowboys Pro Scouting Coordinator turned Director of
Football Research turned Assistant Director of Player Personnel
turned current Vice President of Player Personnel Will McClay?!” you
breathlessly say. Yes, indeed, and to once again stop the potential
talent bleed, GM Jerry has successfully paid, err, played keep away
to prevent other GM-needy teams from prying McClay away.
Will They Or Won’t They?
NFL Wild Card Weekend has officially arrived and – no matter the
amount of fan screaming, yelling, hype(rventilating) videos, or
séances with the dead – it is entirely on America’s Team to ensure
by Sunday evening they have thrived (or – once again – allowed their
latest playoff participation to be prematurely put to bed).
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Having a 4,000-yard passer, a 1,000-yard rusher, a 1,000-yard
receiver, a 10+ sack linebacker, and a 10+ interception cornerback
is FABULOUS on regular season paper, but if you cannot
proportionally replicate those achievements in the postseason, they
amount to no more than vapor.
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Playoff games between the Dallas Cowboys and San Francisco 49ers
have been epic battles – from 1981 to 1994 – with fans of each team
licking their chops to find out what is in store. While memories of
those battles remain great, neither of “today’s” teams could ever
comparatively rate. Fans – including yours truly – who witnessed
those marvelous games clearly know there is a big, Big, BIG
difference and would become sick at even the faintest comparative
inference.
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“And yet, AND YET” until the latest version of America’s Team
recaptures that DEEP playoff-winning gleam, they will continue to be
made (by furious fans and provocative prognosticators all the same)
to involuntarily carry the dark mark of two-and-a-half decades of
failures to finally reach another NFC conference championship game
or fulfill the most-holy Super-Bowl-winning theme. For all the
super-sized glamor and steroidal endorsement opportunities that come
with being many (but not all) a Dallas Cowboys player, (seemingly)
no amount of fame and fortune can diminish that shame, Shame, SHAME.
Say a prayer.
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Head coach Mike McCarthy, defensive coordinator Dan Quinn, offensive
coordinator Kellen Moore, and special teams coordinator John “Bones”
Jones – as well as the entire Cowboys’ roster – (should) know EXACTLY what
they MUST do to AVOID being one-and-done playoff imposters.
McCarthy, Quinn, Moore, and Jones – as well as the entire Cowboys’
roster – (should) know EXACTLY what the visiting San Francisco 49ers CAN and
WILL TRY to do if it IS victory that their head coach Kyle “Son Of”
Shanahan wishes to foster.
Though professional football is the pinnacle of TEAM sport, NFL
history is fill with moments where it is the QUARTERBACK a team must
turn to as a or THE last resort. Dak Prescott and 49ers starting
quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo (AKA Jimmy G, Porn Star Jimmy, or “The
Brittle Riddle”) both have playoff reputations they wish to
(further) improve. Will it be Prescott and Garoppolo who discovers
(or rediscovers) their DEEP postseason groove? Will the reappearance
of horrible hesitation or frustrating fragility end up stunting
their TEAM’s ability?
Dallas’ and San Francisco’s offenses are both capable of lighting up
opponents in different ways. San Francisco’s offense can tap the
(intermittent)
brilliance, adaptable knowledge, and significant experience of TWO
generations of Super Bowl head coaches embodied by Kyle Shanahan.
Dallas’ offense – when operating with ALL their starters in
reasonable health – can often (but not always) withstand rigid play
calls AND still display point-scoring wealth no matter the
“schemeless” approach of Kellen Moore (the boy genius with the
ironically-inflexible plan).
“W-What about Mike McCarthy? Does his Super Bowl experience count
for NOTHING?! Yeah, yeah, I am totally, Totally, TOTALLY BLUFFING!”
you offer up so sarcastically (while acknowledging the MAMMOTH
impact of Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers on McCarthy’s
pre-Cowboys coaching career which – when coaching without Rodgers as
his starter – went quite tragically as success was infinitely
harder).-
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Nonetheless, the Cowboys’ and 49ers’ defenses both play hard and fast. Will
boiling hot head coaching candidate Dan Quinn and his defense be
able to put Jimmy Garoppolo and San Francisco’s offense on BLAST?
The Cowboys’ special teams – save for their kooky kicker – have been
a breath of fresh air . . . but would “another, Another, ANOTHER”
missed extra point or field goal by Greg “The Strong But Unreliable
Leg” Zuerlein be too much to bear?
BOTH teams can, in fact, be physical but will the ability to avoid
hills – no, mountains – of mental mistakes and PENALTIES be far more
integral?
Will a perpetually-loyal Cowboys Nation be more DEEPLY rewarded, or
will the Cowboy stop themselves from being awarded?
We shall see. We always do.
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